Hello sweet friends. I sure hope that you all are thriving this summer. I had another post written before I left for the beach, but this morning God directed me in a completely different direction. Father’s Day for me has become a bittersweet day. We do tend to reflect on days like this. My Dad has been in Heaven since 2014, it’s been a long nine years. Most of this time has been in a trauma-bonded relationship. I will tell you that you don’t properly grieve death during this bond. You simply don’t have the time or mindset to do so. We had several closely timed deaths around that period, and none were grieved fully. I didn’t fully grieve until two years ago when I was out of the trauma bond. Mainly because I could totally feel and embrace the losses.
This morning was no different of course I miss my father greatly but instead of suppressing my thoughts by doing something else I allowed the waves of thoughts and feelings to come and feel them and well what I do now is write. As I was writing in my journal, I was also filled with happy thoughts that my father would be so proud of what a great daddy my son had become. I’m very proud of him because well, both of my children’s lives could’ve been much different. They both had fathers that were less than desirable. Each has broken generational trauma/curses in their family. Besides my own, they had to deal with their biological father’s issues and families. Thankfully, both children are intelligent, beautiful, professional, and successful adults. As for my son, he always wanted to be a father and now is the father of two handsome, smart, and spitfire all boys. They all are the total joy of my life.
Today as always, I’m so very grateful to my Heavenly Father for them, for rescuing us and directing us into the people He wants us to be for Him. Don’t lose hope friends when you don’t see immediate results from your healing, there are so many layers we have to encounter and move through. It won’t always be easy and although it’s a long journey it’s worth it. No matter what you’re healing from there’s always hope. He’s our hope and direction always. Thank you for being with me here on this journey. Blessings until the next time.